A note from the future

This site represents things that I, Matt Dragon, though worthy of posting to the internet to be publicly consumed from age 18-27. Many of those things were, and are, wrong. I used words here at the time I hadn't bothered to educate myself about the harms of. The fact they were more widely used then doesn't absolve my use of them. Many of my opinions reek of what I now understand to be white male privilege.

But I'm not going to take those posts or this site down. For one because it wouldn't matter, the internet is forever and people would still be able to find it. But also because it's important to acknowledge that people should and do change over time. Merely changing doesn't reverse the wrongs or forgive us of what we said or did before. But the actions we take in response to those personal changes should be evaluated to see if they can offset at least some of the harms we caused. I no longer believe people are beyond redemption if they put in the work and the communities their prior words or acts hurt decide to accept their help going forward.

Taking this down entirely wouldn't address the harms nor hold me accountable. So instead I'm adding this note and asking people to evaluate for themselves if they think that 2021 Matt has done enough to offset 2010 Matt. To be honest, these were not my worst takes. Around this time I also stated less publicly that when people run from the police they should hit them with their cars to catch them. If you run you must have done something, right? I had an argument with someone about how no one who wasn't guilty would ever confess to a crime. (Sorry random dude in MegaBYTES)

Obviously those takes were bad, uninformed, and I was wrong for voicing then at the time. I share them because I feel they represent how easy it was to feel empowered as a white male teenager and young adult despite knowing almost nothing. I share them because I think they represent the rock bottom of my opinions and show how much someone's thoughts can change when you simply seek out first hand knowledge and then listen.

Those are just terrible opinions I can remember right now. I'm sure there were others. I haven't exhaustively read all the posts here so there may be similar or worse things I said here. But today, I'm writing letters to the editor about the need for civilian oversight over jails and the police and advocating for the police to be taken out of traffic enforcement. I'm speaking at County Commissioners meetings about civilian jail oversight and the need for accountability. I'm constantly trying to unlearn my bad habits and challenge my initial responses to things. Not because the world has changed but because I have learned to listen. Because people took the risk, the time, and the emotional effort to share and luckily I realized I needed to hear them.

So I leave this up, with this now lengthy disclaimer to try to push folks reading my bad takes to also learn to listen, and to be explicit, not always and only listen to white dudes like me. Where I'm at now, I'm trying to lift other voices. Folks actually experiencing the struggles I have ideas about trying to lessen or solve. Folks who's opinions I trust not because they have degrees or status, but because they're talking about their community, their friends, their family, their life, their struggles. For some of my later posts elsewhere, I chose to channel Dennis Miller when naming that blog. That decision didn't age any better than he did. He's now a racist bigot or at least he is publicly, maybe he always was. He's probably beyond redemption at this point. Andrew Gutmann is probably beyond redemption too, but it's honestly not my decision. I think people definitely can change, and they can change for better or for worse.

So I've done some more recent writing elsewhere that, if you want to read it, is definitely more informed, less self absorbed, with fewer blind spots, and just generally better all around.

My whiteness and maleness have given me all the second, third, and fourth chances anyone could ever ask for. It's up to me to prove I've changed for the better. Hopefully this is a step in that direction.

if only i could sport the zoot suit...

posted 04/30/2004 23:03:04 by matt flesch-kincaid: 61, grade level: 9 commentscomments(0) linklink
so i think barry melrose is trying to hypnotize people with those crazy stripes on the suits he wears on tv. can't someone at espn tell him he looks like a tv test pattern with some sort of woodland creature on top.

just when you though baywatch was the peak of his career

posted 04/30/2004 16:38:59 by matt flesch-kincaid: -8, grade level: 16 commentscomments(0) linklink
very,very disturbing...ice t to produce david hasselholf rap record

death by caffeine

posted 04/30/2004 16:38:17 by matt flesch-kincaid: 50, grade level: 9 commentscomments(0) linklink
so just in case you're worried about your caffeine intake hurting you, here's a page that tells you exactly how many cans/bottles/etc. of different drinks it would take to build up a toxic level of caffeine in your body, based on your weight. pretty cool. also there's some cool futurama images on the same site.

new hosting...

posted 04/30/2004 16:37:42 by matt flesch-kincaid: 63, grade level: 8 commentscomments(0) linklink
so the domain name has changed, i may point mattdragon.com here eventually too. this site is hosted at 1 & 1 which has some great deals on linux hosting. it's not so much that i hate microsoft as that having mysql as opposed to access as a prospective backend isn't much of a choice, oh and php is pretty cool too.

i admit it, i stalk andrew bruck...

posted 04/14/2004 07:32:00 by matt flesch-kincaid: 68, grade level: 5 commentscomments(0) linklink
or at least i stalk his aim profile. so this is stolen yet again from bruck's profile. the daily record talks about the sopranos season, and includes this quote, "Apparently Delbarton School is giving Anthony Jr. some trouble, too. A.J. and his football team just can't beat the Green Wave, something a lot of New Jersey teams can relate to." yeah that's right, even mob connections can't help you there.

so here's my wednesday...

posted 04/12/2004 11:23:00 by matt flesch-kincaid: 62, grade level: 10 commentscomments(0) linklink
so last sunday, there's a car accident in front of my apartment that knocks down two light poles. parts of one of these light poles end up scattered all across the street, including in front of my apartment.
so last wednesday around 1pm i leave my apartment and notice on the curb the transformer from the light post, a small metal box with wires running in and out of it. as i get across the street i think to myself, "if i didn't know that was a transformer, i might think it was a bomb." so later that night, claire and i leave my apartment, and there's cops everywhere, with the street closed, police taped off, cars being detoured, etc. a cop comes over to us and says we can't be here, "the area is closed off." so we walk around and stand and watch as the bomb squad truck drives off. so the next day in the paper, that article is there, and i go, holy shit, that was totally the box i saw.

sometimes even i can't come up with titles...

posted 04/02/2004 04:14:00 by matt flesch-kincaid: 76, grade level: 3 commentscomments(0) linklink
or is it terrorism?

why i hate people...

posted 04/02/2004 04:12:00 by matt flesch-kincaid: 58, grade level: 12 commentscomments(0) linklink
so say your a mother of three, sitting in your living room and your kid picks up a toy spear that odds say you bought him and you decide god is telling you to kill your children, i would say that you deserve to have your head beaten in with a rock, just like you did to them...but before we jump to conclusions, lets hear it from the source: a housewife said the first sign that god wanted her to kill her three boys came mother's day weekend when she saw her 14-month-old playing with a toy spear. deanna laney said she resisted at first, but the signs kept coming. the baby came to her with a rock, and later in the day squeezed a frog, and she believed god was suggesting that she should either stab, stone or strangle her children. ok so now i've seen kids smashing toy cars together, does that mean god wants them to be in a car accident, how about when kids play with toy guns? obviously god wants you to pop a cap in those little bitches. of course when your playing a game of other-worldly telephone with the big guy upstairs it might pay to ask for a second opinion, before you smash your kids skulls in with a rock.

undead got you down?

posted 04/02/2004 04:12:00 by matt flesch-kincaid: 78, grade level: 5 commentscomments(0) linklink
just burn their hearts...ah you silly romanians, and btw, shouldn't knight ridder news be written by kit, or at the very least michael knight?

news flash...

posted 04/01/2004 04:32:00 by matt flesch-kincaid: 56, grade level: 8 commentscomments(0) linklink
fez = cool ...
and in other news... google has opened up applications for jobs on the moon; thinkgeek is selling an ez-bake oven that fits in a drive bay, makes me sad that i have a laptop; they also have caffine patches...thank you god my prayers have been answered, although it really can't beat caffenated meatloaf.